Fly the really, really unfriendly skies: Black metal legend Euronymous could wind up on the side of a plane
Posted by jakemanson
We’ve always said that if there’s one thing the airline industry needs, it’s more black metal. I mean, what image emblazoned across the tail fin of a Boeing 737 could possibly make travelers feel safer than the painted visage of Mayhem‘s murdered leader, Øystein “Euronymous” Aarseth, glaring down at the passenger cabin like a guardian demon from some especially cold, Norwegian circle of hell?
Thanks to an online poll currently being conducted by Norwegian, a discount Scandinavian airline (think Southwest, only the flight attendants have better cheekbones), the above scenario could actually happen. Norwegian is asking their customers to pick famous Norwegian people to grace the tail fins of four planes in their fleet, and currently, Euronymous is leading in the poll for the Oslo-based jet. If you want to get in on the black metal action, go here and cast your vote (the site’s in Norwegian, but the voting’s pretty easy to figure out).
Voters can submit their own candidates, but as far as we can tell, Euronymous was actually one of the famous people nominated by the good folks at Norwegian, which officially makes them the coolest airline on the planet. At least until Virgin steps up and puts Ozzy Osbourne on the side of one of their planes. No, wait, that still wouldn’t be cooler than honoring an avowed Satanist who was hacked to death by his own bass player.
Voting closes March 28th (aka this Wednesday), so get cracking. And a word of advice to Norwegian: If Euronymous wins, I wouldn’t puss out if I were you. Those Norwegian black metal people have been known to burn shit down when they get cranky.
(P.S. Big ups to Richard from Army of Gay Unicorns for alerting us to this story. You, sir, are the wind beneath our inverted-cross-covered wings.)
[Update: As of April 5th, Euronymous has sadly been removed from the list of candidates for tail fin immortality, at the behest of his family. If you black metal fans need a new online campaign to wage, I suggest lobbying the makers of Newcastle Brown Ale to make a limited-edition Newcastle Black Ale honoring Newcastle natives Venom. Get on it!]