Dukey Flyswatter is getting Haunted Garage back together

hauntedgarage

Splatter punks Haunted Garage have played a few reunion shows in the years since they broke up in 1993, but they’ve mostly been one-off type deals. But this time, if we can believe the band’s Facebook page, they’re cranking things up a notch. Apparently mousetrap-loving frontman Dukey Flyswatter has assembled an all-new lineup and is rehearsing for some fall shows and a four-song EP. Here’s Dukey’s most recent Facebook update, typos and all, posted this past Friday:

Hellz Bellz!!! Haunted Garage 2013 just had it’s first rehearsal and it sounded pretty good. New guys, New engergy. WE need weird guest performers and props and newbies to showcase their make up and other skills. Were almost back to square one with the stage show but it wont’s take long.

You read right, kids: Dukey wants YOU to help him make this back-from-the-dead version of Haunted Garage the greatest and goriest one yet. Sounds like they’re set for musicians, but if you can contribute some crazy visuals, hit the man up.

We’ll keep you posted on Haunted Garage 2013 as more details emerge. In the meantime, here’s a little taste of Dukey’s other band, the Undead Kennedys, a zombie DK tribute band featuring members of our pals the Radioactive Chicken Heads. How did we not know about this sooner? We need to get out more.

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New Misfits live album “DEA.D.ALIVE!” coming next month

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Did you know ghoul-rockers The Misfits haven’t released a live album since the ’80s? It’s true. All their albums since the ’80s have been dead. In more ways than one. I kid, of course! The ’90s and ’00s Misfit albums are perfectly serviceable if your like your horror-punk with its rotting tongue planted firmly in its decaying cheek.

Anyway, the live drought is finally ending on Feb. 5th, when Jerry Only and co. will unleash DEA.D.ALIVE! on a terrorized populace. The album features all tracks from the post-Danzig version of the band, but there’s still hope for you fogey-punks who miss the good ol’ days of “Die, Die My Darling” and “Horror Business”: In an interview with Rolling Stone, Only says there’s some “’77-’83 material that we performed together back in the day that remain unreleased, just sitting in the vaults…It’s not out of the realm of possibility that Glenn and I might evaluate some of that stuff in the not-too-distant future and consider bringing it to the fans in a joint effort.” Which sounds pretty weak, I know…but compared to some of the words Only has had for Danzig in the past, it’s practically a Glenn ‘n’ Jerry lovefest.

That Rolling Stone article also features a preview of a track off DEA.D.ALIVE!, a live version of “Shining.” It doesn’t exactly make me wanna rush out and buy this set on limited-edition “solid gold” vinyl (and by the way, I’m pretty sure they mean solid gold-colored vinyl…otherwise I’m gonna start hoarding Misfits LPs for the coming apocalypse), but it does make me think it might be fun to finally go to a Misfits show. Like most people who own the T-shirt, I’m a poser who’s never actually seen them.

You can pre-order DEA.D.ALIVE! now from the Misfits online store. Here’s the complete tracklist, courtesy of antiMusic:

1.) The Devil’s Rain (3:39)
2.) Vivid Red (1:44)
3.) Land of the Dead (2:00)
4.) Curse of the Mummy’s Hand (3:18)
5.) Cold in Hell (1:54)
6.) Dark Shadows (3:18)
7.) Death Ray (4:02)
8.) Shining (2:39)
9.) American Psycho (1:56)
10.) Dig Up Her Bones (2:26)
11.) Scream! (2:22)
12.) Helena (3:24)
13.) Science Fiction/Double Feature (3:17)
14.) Saturday Night (4:10)

The Misfits

When I want to get into the Halloween spirit, my third favorite thing to do (after answering the door naked and offering Jager shots to the neighborhood kids) is crank up The Misfits. Seriously, is any band more synonymous with Halloween? I think not.

There are, of course, two versions of The Misfits: the original, Glenn Danzig one, and the latter-day, Jerry Only one, also widely known among fans as “the bullshit version.” I actually dig them both for totally different reasons. Danzig’s Misfits were fun, kooky and occasionally scary in a sort of Ramones-meets-Tales From the Crypt way; Only’s Misfits are fun, kooky and occasionally hilarious in a Dead Milkmen-meets-Killer Clowns From Outer Space way. See the difference?

Anyway, I figured this Halloween, it’d be good to honor the original horror punks with a spot on our ever-growing Weird List. Here’s a video from the Jerry Only era. Had they become total parodies of themselves by this point? Of course, but that’s sort of the point.

P.S. Not that the world really needs a new Misfits album, but we got one this month anyway. It’s called The Devil’s Rain and you can hear a track, “Land of the Dead,” by going to their website and clicking the Audio On/Off button. Yes, that’s Jerry doing vocals now. At this point, he can do whatever the hell he wants, but…man. Suddenly, for all the wrong reasons, they’ve gotten kinda scary again.

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Haunted Garage

Have you ever wondered what the missing link is between the Misfits and GWAR? Us neither, but a reader named Jeremy just found it for us and posted it on our Facebook page (and hey, while we’re on the subject, go over to Facebook and “Like” us, will ya? I know, it’s annoying, but you never know…maybe if you do it, we’ll give you a pony). The band is called Haunted Garage and they appear to have taken the fine art of covering your audience in fake blood and real slime to heights that would probably leave Oderus Urungus clutching his codpiece in a fetal position. Okay, maybe not, but they were pretty fucking gross, is what I’m saying.

Haunted Garage were part of the L.A. underground rock scene from around 1985 until 1992, although they’ve done a handful of reunion shows in the years since. They only released one album as far as we can tell, a lost nugget from 1990 called Possession Park, although they also did the soundtracks for a lot of horror and sci-fi B-movies like Nightmare Sisters and The Dead Hate the Living!

The band was started by a B-movie actor and screenwriter named Michael Sonye. Among the credits on his IMDb page: Dorm of the Dead, Terrors From the Clit, Hollywood Chainsaw Bartenders and of course the immortal Troma classic Surf Nazis Must Die, which I’m pretty sure I watched in a bonghit haze back in high school and even then thought, “Wow, this sucks.” For Haunted Garage, Sonye made up an alter ego named Dukey Flyswatter who’s sort of a combination of Iggy Pop, Glenn Danzig and Dr. Frank N. Furter. The band apparently started out playing cover versions of songs from classic horror film soundtracks, but eventually started coming up with original tunes with titles like “Torture Dungeon” and “Brain in a Jar.” Their sound is usually described as horror punk, although Dukey also used the term “splatter punk,” which is a lot more evocative, don’t ya think?

Haunted Garage shows were highly theatrical and sometimes destructive affairs. A bio on the band’s MySpace page claims that their final show, at a long-gone Hollywood dive called the Coconut Teaszer, ended with the crowd tearing down the sprinkler system and girls getting their tops ripped off. Up onstage, most of the blood, gore and mayhem was faked, but sometimes the band could cross over into full-on freakshow territory. Dukey, for example, is famous for attaching mousetraps to his face. (And if you clicked on that link, I apologize. That’s gonna be a tough image to shake, huh?)

There’s a cool “video profile” of Haunted Garage on YouTube, which also introduces such other memorable band members as their drag queen guitarist, Gaby Godhead, their rat-loving drummer, Stiff Slug, and the “gore-gore girls,” who provided the eye candy. But the video that we felt would give y’all the best taste of Haunted Garage in all their gory glory was the one below, featuring a sort of necrophiliac love song called “Dead and Gone.” Stay with it till around the 2:30 mark, when it really takes a turn for the freaky.

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