Iwrestledabearonce + Steve Vai = fuck yes

IWABOc

As if Iwrestledabearonce didn’t make crazy enough music all by themselves, they just released a track called “Carnage Asada” that features a guitar solo by Steve fucking Vai. Right now you can only hear it over on the Guitar World website, so head over there now and crank it up. Don’t worry, we won’t feel abandoned.

“Carnage Asada” is off IWABO’s forthcoming album, Late for Nothing, which is coming out Aug. 6th on Century Media Records. Here’s a little infomercial for it…and yes, that phone number at the end really does work. You should call it and see what happens.

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Iwrestledabearonce release first studio track featuring Courtney LaPlante: “Thunder Chunky”

Iwrestledabearonce

I’m pretty sure everyone assumed by now that Krysta Cameron would not be singing on the new Iwrestledabearonce album, but in case anyone was still holding out, we can now officially dash your hopes: Late for Nothing, the grindcore mathcore metalcore experimental metal band’s third full-length album, will exclusively feature the vocals of Courtney LaPlante, who took over for Krysta last summer during the Warped Tour. Sorry, Krysta fans. For now, metal’s greatest girl death growler seems totally happy being a mom and selling stuff on Etsy.

To close the book on IWABO’s Krysta era once and for all, here’s the lead track from Late for Nothing, “Thunder Chunky.” It’s a bit more conventionally structured and—dare we use the “M” word?—mainstream than past IWABO offerings, but there are still some whiplash tempo changes, including a nifty little ska-like bridge, and LaPlante toggles between clean and dirty vocals almost as effortlessly as Krysta ever did. Have a listen.

Recorded in L.A. in guitarist Steven Bradley’s home studio, Late for Nothing is “our most diverse album to date,” according to Bradley. “It’s a more evolved version of the band.  We explored new styles and genres as well—especially in terms of the more spacey, epic, and beautiful parts. It’s got the most melodic moments of our career as well as the heaviest.”

Late for Nothing is due out August 6th on Century Media Records. You can pre-order it here.

VirginTurtleWhore

VirginTurtleWhore2

Once again you, the people, have crowned a new Weird Band of the Week. That’s how people get crowned, right? By popular vote? It’s what we do here in America at homecoming dances, anyway.

The point is, we posted another Facebook poll, and this band from Mexico called VirginTurtleWhore totally crushed the competition. So how do you say “Congrats” in Spanish? “Congracias”? That doesn’t sound right. I really should have paid closer attention in Spanish class, but I was listening to bands like VirginTurtleWhore.

We actually don’t know all that much about VTW. We know they’re from Puerto Vallarta and seem to have been around since 2005 or so.  They describe themselves as experimental death metal. They cite Fantomas as one of their influences, which we’re totally down with. They were once a four-piece but there seem to be five of them now: NioX (vocals), PaSkKal (drums), Doña C’anobhia (bass), The Unk and Pack Man (guitars). There may be a sixth member named Teghsie but there’s just a bunch of question marks next to his or her name on the VirginTurtleWhore Facebook page so we’re not sure if that really counts.

Live, they seem to usually cover their faces, but not always their asses. Or their pendejos. (That means both “dumbass” and “pubic hair” in Spanish, or so we’re told. If UrbanDictionary.com had existed when I took Spanish, I might have actually passed.)

It looks like they released an album in 2009 called Evoluphilia that kinda sounds like a cross between Fantomas, Iwrestledabearonce and maybe something like Enter Shikari, because they throw in the occasional electronic dance elements before getting to the 200 bpm, face-melting shit. You can hear some of that stuff here and here. It’s definitely not for pussies.

More recently, they seem to be working on a new album just called Evolution. They’ve released one track from it called “Exxxistencia” that has a kind of amazing video, which you can watch below. Stay with it until you see the headbanging cows. It gets really good after that, trust me. It’s like Discovery Channel After Dark.

So congrats again, VTW! And stay tuned for our next Weird Band Poll. They just keep getting crazier.

Links:

Iwrestledabearonce are working on a new album. But who’s singing on it?

IWABO-2013

As the girl who had to replace Krysta Cameron on lead vocals for Iwrestledabearonce, Courtney LaPlante has one of the most thankless jobs in all of rock-dom. Months since LaPlante took over screaming/singing duties, IWABO fans still routinely post things like “the new vocalist sings like shit” and “When Krysta’s back????” on the band’s Facebook page. Because, y’know, Iwrestledabearonce is the FIRST BAND EVER IN HISTORY TO REPLACE THEIR LEAD SINGER. And all just because their former lead singer decided to have a baby. What-fucking-ever.

The dude members of IWABO aren’t really helping dampen the Courtney/Krysta controversy, either. Krysta’s still listed as the lead singer on the band’s official website. Cold, guys, cold.

Still, when IWABO announced this week on their Facebook page that they are “currently writing a new album,” LaPlante was the one in the accompanying photo. Presumably this means she’ll be the one singing on the new album, too…but who knows? So long as IWABO fans keep pouring on the haterade and the band doesn’t update their official bio to at least mention her, there’s always a chance she’ll finally just say “Fuck this shit” and walk.

But, if she doesn’t…expect new music from the Krysta-less version of Iwrestledabearonce later this year. And maybe a wacky cover or two.

Meanwhile, those still mourning the departure of Krysta should order a copy of A Beary Scary Movie, IWABO’s feature film debut. Not only does it feature Krysta doing her best scream-queen impersonation, it also boasts a “special appearance by Jake Busey.” Aren’t all appearances by Jake Busey special? Here’s the trailer:

Meet Iwrestledabearonce’s new singer, Courtney LaPlante

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Can this girl…
…replace this girl?

So apparently about two months ago, our favorite spazzy metalcore band Iwrestledabearonce got themselves a new lead singer. Who knew? Well, every other music blog on the planet, if you want to get all technical about it. We’re still getting the hang of this whole report-the-music-news thing, so “bear” with us, people. (And yes, we just made a “bear” pun. Do you forgive us now for reporting this story two months late?)

For the six of you that don’t already know this: IWABO’s original awesome singer Krysta Cameron abruptly went on hiatus from the group this summer when she decided she didn’t want to continue the Warped Tour while pregnant. On “literally a few minutes notice,” according to IWABO guitarist and abuser of the word “literally” Steven Bradley, she was replaced by Canadian singer/screamer Courtney LaPlante. LaPlante’s been on the road with the band ever since, including a current string of dates in Europe.

So what do we know about Ms. LaPlante? Well, she lives in British Columbia but, according to her Facebook page, she’s originally from Alabama. She’s in another band called Unicron who play a sort of pop/electronic/screamo mishmash that sounds like this. She plays the piano. And she’s apparently down with Die Antwoord, so we’ll forgive her for being involved with this abomination.

As for Krysta: Officially, she’s still on temporary hiatus from IWABO, and still listed as vocalist on the band’s website. Unofficially, though, her return looks increasingly doubtful. In an interview with punk/metal site Property of Zack, bassist Mike “Ricky” Martin came out and said, “I’m going to say she’s permanently gone.” (“Fingers crossed though,” drummer Mikey Montgomery quickly added—but as we all know, no one really cares what the drummer thinks.) And then there’s the fact that Unicron recently announced “a hiatus for the foreseeable future,” which sure doesn’t sound like the words of a band that expects their lead singer to come back. (Best Unicron fan response in the comments: “Krysta, you’re ruining it for everybody.”)

While she waits for the arrival of her little bundle of joy, Krysta has turned her attention to crafting. You can buy yourself a Krysta-designed barrette, pouch or tote bag via her Etsy page, OffWithHerThreads,

Meanwhile, IWABO continue their epic, global string of tour dates, all with Courtney on the mic. Early fan feedback on her performances has been mixed, but judging from the video below, which was shot at an Iwrestledabearonce show in Belgium a couple of weeks ago, she’s settling into her new gig quite nicely. She’s no Krysta—who is?—but she does a pretty mean death growl and her clean vocals have an appealingly throaty, emotional quality. On the replacement lead singer scale, we’re gonna say she’s safely somewhere between Brian Johnson and Gary Cherone.

Related stories:

Got a question for Iwrestledabearonce? Hollywood Waste is here to help.

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Have you always wondered how those crazy kids in Iwrestledabearonce keep their skin looking so fresh and acne-free? Or which demon Krysta Cameron made a pact with to achieve her throat-shredding vocal prowess? Or perhaps you’d like to find out where they buy their shoes. Well, now’s your chance!

Tomorrow, some website we just found out about called Hollywood Waste is shooting a video interview with IWABO, and they want you, the fans, to do their work for them provide the questions. Just mosey on over to this page and leave a question in the comments section. (We’re pretty sure all you confused kids who left questions on IWABO’s Facebook page are shit outta luck, which is too bad, because “If you had to name your kid after an illegal drug, what would it be?” might be the greatest band interview question ever.)

Also, if you happen to be in L.A. tonight, swing by Soundcheck Hollywood for an in-store signing/ice cream party with the band. I really hope they have some special IWABO flavors there like “Tastes Like Kevin Bacon Chocolate Chip” or “Karate Nipple Ripple,” but I haven’t been able to confirm that.

Iwrestledabearonce announce new tour dates

After spending much of the past year opening for bands named after classic American novels (Of Mice and Men, As I Lay Dying…maybe next they could open for The Dangerous Summer?), it’s about time those crazy kids in Iwrestledabearonce finally had some headlining shows of their own. So here they are! It’s the official IWABO “Road to Metal Fest” tour, coming soon to a landlocked city near you:

“Road To Metal Fest” Tour
4/16 – Oklahoma City, OK @ Conservatory
4/17 – Memphis, TN @ New Daisy Theater
4/18 – Knoxville, TN @ Valarium
4/20 – Springfield, VA @ Empire
4/21 – Worcester, MA @ The Palladium – New England Metal and Hardcore Festival
4/23 – Pittsburgh, PA @ Altar Bar
4/24 – Evansville, IN @ Boney Junes
4/25 – Bloomington, IL @ The Castle Theater
4/26 – Des Moines, IA @ Vaudeville Mews
4/27 – Iowa City, IA @ Blue Moose
4/29 – Denver, CO @ Marquis Theatre
4/30 – Albuquerque, NM @ Launchpad
5/01 – Flagstaff, AZ @ Cinnabar

We’ll play this post out with the video for “You Know That Ain’t Them Dogs’ Real Voices” off IWABO’s latest album, Ruining It for Everybody, available now online and wherever they still sell CDs that don’t suck. Best. Children’s. Party. Ever.

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